Reddit: Grandmother refuses to babysit unless paid

Young working mom is furious when her own mother refuses to babysit her daughter unless she gets $20 an hour

  • A young mother, 29, claims her retired mother doesn’t want to babysit
  • The 64-year-old grandmother wants to be paid for her time and service
  • The daughter asked Reddit if it’s unreasonable to expect free babysitting

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A new mother was shocked when her own mother demanded to be paid to babysit.

The 29-year-old mother from the US planned to return to work and did not want to go into more debt to pay for childcare costs.

But when she asked her 64-year-old retired mother for help, she refused.

Share the details Reddit, the woman asked ‘am I the bastard?’ because she wanted her own mother to take care of her baby for free.

A retired 64-year-old grandmother refuses to babysit her grandchild unless she is paid $20 an hour.  This demand left her daughter, 29, furious and unsure of what to do (stock image)

A retired 64-year-old grandmother refuses to babysit her grandchild unless she is paid $20 an hour. This demand left her daughter, 29, furious and unsure of what to do (stock image)

In the post, the woman describes how her mother “has been a housewife / stay-at-home mom since 1992 and has not worked since.”

She also added that if I really wanted this baby, maybe I should have remembered to stay home, as she did to take care of it while my partner goes to work and takes care of us as a ‘traditional’ family, and that if they If my father managed to solve it, so can we,” the woman wrote.

The new mom said she earns more than her partner — who has $5,000 in debt — and can’t afford to stay home.

“When I explained all of the above to my mom, she then said she would charge me $20 an hour for every hour she takes care of the baby, plus late payment fees if we are late for pick up she wrote, claiming her mom “does nothing but watch TV and cook dinner.”

The grandmother also demanded that her daughter provide all the essentials for the baby – including a car seat, stroller, bottles and “pretty much everything.”

“She won’t set foot in my house for her own personal reasons (she came in once and I’ve lived with my partner for 5 years; she’s 15 minutes away),” the mother continued.

Survey

Who do you think is unreasonable?

  • The young mother 376 votes
  • The grandmother 134 votes

“I want to save money to reduce our debt, and I don’t want to pay her that much, nor invest that much in doubling everything, because it will lead to even more debt for me and my partner.

“I’m about to enroll my baby in a daycare instead, as the cost will generally be lower and a little closer to our house.”

Working from home is also not an option for the couple and other family members work full time during office hours.

“Am I the asshole for wanting my mother, who is home all day again, to take care of my baby for free while me and my partner try to get our finances in order?” the mother asked.

The daughter shared the details on Reddit, asking “am I the asshole?” because she wants her own mother to take care of her baby for free while she goes back to work (stock image)

The Reddit thread was flooded with comments from more than 2,300 people sharing their advice and opinions — and many sided with the grandma.

“Sorry to be blunt and rude, but maybe don’t have kids if you can’t afford to take care of them. And if you always intended to go back to work, you should have discussed that with your mother before pregnancy,” one wrote.

“The audacity to neglect her mother’s time. ‘She does nothing’: BECAUSE SHE IS 64!!!’ said another.

A third added: “Your mother is under no obligation to babysit you.”

But others understood the dilemma.

“The best thing you can do is start building your childcare system. Look at nurseries. Make some mom friends in the same boat as you and switch babysitting jobs. Go, okay, mom isn’t interested, that sucks, what are other options?’ suggested another.

Another was more blunt about it: “You’re not an asshole if you want her to take care of your baby.” And she’s not an asshole because she doesn’t want to be. I know it would be a blessing if your mother spent more time and wanted to take care of your child. But she doesn’t.’

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