I’m a therapist – here’s what you should remember when in a fight with your partner
A therapist has revealed the five things to keep in mind during a discussion with your partner, including that you are a team and that life is not black and white.
jeff guentherfrom Portland, Oregon, has become a viral TikTok sensation for frequently sharing her expertise in the love and romance departments.
Most recently, she shared a video with her 2.6 million followers detailing the most important things to keep in mind so that an argument doesn’t lead to a permanent rift between you and your boyfriend.
According to the love specialist, you and your lover should work on having a clear line of communication instead of provoking each other during a fight so that you can have a lasting romance.
Jeff Guenther, from Portland, Oregon, has revealed the five things to keep in mind during an argument with your partner.
The therapist has become a viral TikTok sensation for often sharing his expertise in the love and romance departments.
Most recently, he shared a video with his 2.6 million followers detailing the most important things to keep in mind in a fight, including that it’s a team.
He captioned the clip, which racked up more than 97,000 views, “Five important things to remember the next time you have a fight with your partner.”
The first thing the therapist said to remember is that you are a ‘team’.
He said: ‘Remember you’re a team, it’s not just about me against you.
“If you’re preparing to win the argument, you’ve already missed the point.”
Next, Jeff recommended that you and your partner remember where arguments start.
He noted that disagreements do not arise from a desire or need to provoke conflict, but from a desire to create peace.
“Arguments arise out of a desire for peace, not to make your partner feel bad,” she said.
The therapist went on to explain that you and your boyfriend should strive for harmony.
“You both seek harmony, so in the midst of conflict, strive to communicate, understand and grow together rather than focus on the disagreement itself,” he explained.
For his third piece of advice, the love specialist said to keep in mind that life isn’t ‘black and white.’
Next, Jeff recommended that you and your partner remember where arguments come from.
As a third piece of advice, he pointed out that you should remember that life is not black and white, and that both of you should remember that things are not black and white.
“It’s full of shades of gray, things are nuanced and layered. There is no one correct way to say things.
“Both of your emotional experiences are valid and should be respected equally,” he explained.
The fourth thing you should never forget, according to the love expert, is that flexibility is crucial for things to work.
He said that if you and your boyfriend are not willing to commit, then the relationship will never last.
‘Flexibility is crucial for any relationship to work, you like your partner, you want them to feel good.
“So instead of fighting, ask yourself what are you willing to adjust to keep your partner happy and safe,” said therapy Jeff.
The fourth thing you should never forget, according to the love expert, is that flexibility is crucial for things to work.
The last thing the therapist said to remember is how to recognize your triggers.
The last thing the therapist said to remember is how to recognize your triggers.
Jeff said that by knowing whether or not you are angry, you can better respond to your partner.
If you know your weaknesses, you can approach the discussion with more love than you would if you were unable to recognize them.
Either you are activated or you are not. When provoked, you’re defensive and scared, and when you’re not, you’re warm and loving.
So what should you both do to avoid feeling triggered?
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